Parenting Tips; Transitions to a New School or Class
At this time of year as families are making choices about school for next year, it is important to remember a few things about your kiddos. Children between the ages of 3 and 7 have little understanding of abstract time segments like weeks or months, “summer”, or “next fall”. If your child is going to change schools for next year, that change is likely being discussed at your house now. You have probably even gone to visit the new school. A child should be told the amount of details that he or she needs at this time. For some children, that is very little. For others, it is more. They need to see the new school over and over and visit it in order to be at ease. Realizing again about children’s lack of understanding about time, after the decision and initial discussion have occurred, we believe parents should drop the topic until the school year is nearly over.
Be aware of signs of confusion, even stress, at the time of an impending change. Some of those signs can include (but are not limited to) fussiness, lack of focus, pulling back from friends, not sleeping well, and any other changes in otherwise normal behavior patterns.
Even children who are staying at Shady Oak, but changing classes, may show some signs of dealing with a change. Much later in the Spring, at school, we will help children begin to think about going to their next classes at Shady Oak. For now, though, let’s “seize the day” and enjoy it to the fullest.
Fighting Commercialization with Toy Choices
As you are shopping for gifts for your children and others on your list for Christmas this year, we ask that you give consideration to gifts that lend themselves to creativity and to imaginative play. Low tech playthings allow the child to devise the theme of play and foster originality and inventiveness.
High tech toys—invariably the ones that need batteries—stifle the child’s fantasy world. For some very helpful suggestions for toys see the TRUCE website www.truceteachers.org.
It’s not just the quality and type of toys that parents need to be wary of—it’s also the sheer quantity of playthings that can accumulate. What’s wrong with endless toys? For one thing, a surplus of these possessions is bad in the same way that having too many possessions is bad for adults. They need to be picked up, maintained, organized, cleaned, and stored. They cost a lot. And, too, all of that non-recyclable plastic takes a huge toll on the earth. In a paper called “Curing the ‘Gimmes’”, Mary Kalifan, the director of the Parent Child Resource Service at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, gives these reasons for not giving our kids so many toys:
1. Constant indulgence breeds a feeling of entitlement.
2. Excess breeds boredom.
3. We deprive them of the joy of anticipation.
4. Too much choice is confusing to kids.
5. Kids appreciate something more when they have come by it through the sweat of their brow.
6. They may learn to equate love with material objects.
All are good reasons to limit the number of toys your kids have—while ensuring their quality.
The Toll of Commercial Culture on the Rights of Childhood and Your Right to Raise Your Children (Part I)
As I hope you know, we are in the business of preserving childhood at Shady Oak. We celebrate giving your children opportunities and even their “right” to be children. We feel in many ways that this is “going upstream” in today’s culture. Culture, in this context, can be defined as what children see and hear in the world around them. It has a huge impact on their likes and dislikes, their ideas about how the world works and what will make them happy and fulfilled, and even how likely they are to reach their full potential as individuals.
Currently, researchers, educators, parents, and other advocates for the rights of childhood are speaking out about the media and commercial culture that surrounds children today. They are examining children’s behavior, their choices, their play, and other outcomes that can teach us a lot about what children are learning and even, how media and commercialism may be depriving them of the childhoods they need to develop their full potential.
In this article we will look briefly at the effects of “screen-sucking” on children.
Screens are everywhere! Today, screens are a major force in children’s lives.
There are screens in bedrooms, kitchens, mini-vans, airports, and shopping malls.
What’s going on as children sit in front of a screen?
? They are having secondhand experiences-not directly involved in the real world having the concrete hands-on experiences we know are so important for their development and learning.
? They are learning someone else’s lessons-i.e., the scriptwriter’s –about who are the good and bad guys and what good and bad guys do, about the clothes they need to buy to be pretty and “cool” and how they should act when they’re wearing those clothes, i.e., sexy clothes for sexy dances. These are often not the lessons the people who care about them are trying to teach.
? They are getting used to the frenetic, high intensity stimulation that can make everything else seem boring when the screen is turned off.
? They are not exploring their own ideas, working out their own solutions to problems, being creative and imaginative in their own unique ways, but rather are being programmed by someone else.
In the next part of this series of articles on this topic we will take a look at the marketing that is targeting our children.
Does your Cell Phone use effect your children?
Dear Mommy and Daddy,
Today I had a GREAT day at school! We sang songs and did art and played and had snack and played and read some books and learned lots of new things about the world around us and played. I collected mulch in my socks and sand in my shoes, and I will most definitely need a bath tonight.
And guess what??? I am so excited to share my day with you. While I am having such a wonderful time at Shady Oak, I am missing you. The highlight of my day is seeing your face as you come through the gate. I wait anxiously as the other mommies and daddies pick up their kids for you to come.
You see there are things I want to show you: the big hill, how I can finally do the monkey bars, the new friend I played with today, the sandcastle I built, the rocks and acorns I collected, the beautiful picture I drew just for you. There are also things I want to tell you: we had a special snack today because it was my friend’s birthday and we did a cool experiment in science and we sang a new song and we went to chapel today.
I look forward to seeing you. I wonder if it would be possible for you reserve this time just for me. Could you please leave your cell phone in your car when you pick me up? I need this time with you. I can’t tell you all I need to tell you and show you all I need to show you when you are talking on the phone. I promise my excitement to see you and my enthusiasm about my day will be worth it.
I love you lots,
Your Shady Oak Kiddo
Report from the American Academy of Pediatrics
We were pleased to read of the recent report by this prestigious medical group advocating more unstructured time for play for children. At Shady Oak we have been speaking up for the value of play experiences for 20 years. You can read more about this report at www.aap.org and then click onto the link about stress and play. Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg, the report’s lead author and a pediatrician at The Children’ Hospital of Philadelphia said, “In the current environment where so many parents feel pressure to be super parents, I believe this message is an important one.” The report says enrichment tools and organized activities can be beneficial but should not be viewed as a requirement for creating successful children. Above all, they must be balanced with plenty of free play time, the report says.
Numerous studies have shown that unstructured play has many benefits. Those studies are what have driven the Shady Oak program to include long periods for children to engage in what appears to be unstructured play. The play is actually quite structured through the environment which is set up by the teachers. To an observer, the children look like they are “just playing”. But we (and you) know that it is much more than that. The report says, “Perhaps above all, play is a simple joy that is a cherished part of childhood.”
Share this information with your friends with young children who are wondering what type of preschool and primary school experiences to provide for their children. To those of you parents at Shady Oak, thank you for choosing an environment that enhances the healthy development in so many areas for your children. T. Berry Brazelton, noted pediatrician and author, praised the academy report. “I hope it will have some effect.” Children overscheduled with structured activities “are missing the chance they have to dream, to fantasize, to make their own world work the way they want it. That to me is a very important part of childhood,” Brazelton said.
Health News
10 Kids’ Nutrition Myth Busters- Written by Jane Brody
Jane Brody, New Your Times award-winning Personal Health columnist, has always taken a no-nonsense approach to feeding her own children and grand-children. Now she debunks ten myths about your kids’ eating habits.
Slender Charlie’s parents worry that he hardly eats anything, though he seems to be healthy and has lots of energy. Jackson, at age 6, is an avid television watcher. Although he’s in the 50th percentile for height, he’s in the 90th percentile for weight. But his parents are sure he’ll slim down when he starts growing.
Myths about nutrition and physical activity for young children abound. It’s time to set the record straight.
MYTH: CHUBBY CHILDREN WILL OUT-GROW THEIR BABY FAT.
FACT: Fat cells acquired in childhood become permanent residents in the body, and kids may face a lifelong battle to keep them from filling up. But rather than place a chunky child on a diet, encourage healthy foods and more exercise: biking, skating, walking, or swimming — preferably with you — or find a group activity. Also limit TV. Numerous studies have shown that the more time kids spend in front of the tube, the fatter they are likely to become.
MYTH: A FUSSY EATER SHOULD AT LEAST TASTE NEW FOODS.
FACT: The fastest way to turn a child off a new food is to insist that he try it. A better approach is to put a tiny amount on the plate and let the child decide whether it seems worth a taste. Seeing others eat it may be encouragement enough. Repeat this approach periodically, since kids’ notions about food can be fickle.
MYTH: SALTY SNACKS ARE BETTER THAN SUGARY ONES.
FACT: High blood pressure is one of the leading killers of Americans, and the problem can start in childhood with a high-salt diet. The best approach to snacks is moderation — try one sweet and one salty snack a day. Always keep fresh fruit, whole grain crackers with peanut butter, and cut-up veggies with dip on hand.
MYTH: A DAILY VITAMIN CAN COMPENSATE FOR A LIMITED DIET.
FACT: Vitamin supplements and fortified snacks cannot fully compensate for serious nutritional deficiencies. They rarely contain adequate supplies of several important nutrients, like iron and calcium, though fortified cereals, milk, and juice can help to fill in gaps. Try packing nutrient-rich ingredients into foods you know your child will eat, like pasta sauce, meat loaf, soup, or muffins.
MYTH: SEMIPREPARED OR PACKAGED FOODS ARE AS BAD AS FAST FOODS.
FACT: My twin sons might have gone hungry if not for packaged macaroni, frozen fish sticks, and canned spaghetti. With two parents working, it can be hard to prepare home-cooked meals every night. Though most are high in salt, packaged foods served now and then do not spell nutritional disaster. Neither do fast foods, as long as they are eaten only occasionally.
MYTH: SUGAR MAKES KIDS HYPERACTIVE AND HARD TO GET TO SLEEP.
FACT: If your child is revved up after a party, blame the party, not the sweets. Well-designed studies have thoroughly disproved the idea that sugar is a stimulant for children.
MYTH: IF A CHILD IS SLENDER, IT’S OK THAT SHE’S NOT VERY ACTIVE.
FACT: Physical activity is important to lasting good health regardless of a child’s weight. It builds strong muscles and bones, fosters a healthy appetite, promotes social contacts, enhances mood, and induces restful sleep.
MYTH: WORRY ABOUT A CHILD WHO SEEMS TO BE LIVING ON “THIN AIR”.
FACT: No psychologically normal child with wholesome food readily available will deliberately starve, but some children seem able to eat only a little at a time. Offer them small quantities of foods they like; have on hand foods like cheese, fruit, and whole grains, which contain important nutrients, and feed these light eaters more than three times a day. Nothing fills up a child’s stomach faster than “knots” caused by anxiety, coaxing, and criticism. Children should never be cajoled or bribed to eat certain foods or clean their plates.
MYTH: IF CHILDREN ARE NEVER ALLOWED TO HAVE SWEETS, THEY WON’T DEVELOP A TASTE FOR THEM.
FACT: A preference for sweets is built into our genes, and most children like them whether they get them early in life or not. Rather than forbid sweets, regulate how much and how often they are consumed.
MYTH: SKIPPING BREAKFAST IS OKAY AS LONG AS THE CHILD MAKES UP FOR IT LATER.
FACT: Studies have shown that children who don’t eat breakfast tend to be irritable and restless and have more problems with memory, calculations, and quick thinking then breakfast eaters. They’re also more likely to become overweight. Breakfast IS the most important meal of the day.*
*The preceding article is from the February/March 2006 edition of Nick Jr. Family Magazine, pages 72 - 73.
Food For Thought:
The Importance of Water
By Susan Lee M.Ed
Did you know that getting enough water is an important aspect of brain function? It is especially important for children who are in a stage of tremendous brain growth to drink enough water. Eric Jensen in Teaching With The Brain In Mind tells us that dehydration in children leads to lethargy and impaired learning Some children will seem to "wake up" after a few days of adequate water intake. Pure water assists digestion, washes away toxins, aids the lungs, heart and blood vessels and energizes the brain and body.
Think of a living sponge. Without water, a sponge does not receive oxygen or nutrients and therefore has limited function. Thinking skills are related to the quality of "spongabiliy" of the brain which has an almost unlimited capacity when working at it's maximum potential.
Potential. Potential is a good word to understand the role of water in the brain. Without enough water to carry the electrical potential of cells, our thoughts do not move from one brain cell to another as well. Water has the amazing ability to enliven us, fostering the development of energetic, naturally curious, and more focused children.
Carla Hannaford, Ph.D., in Smart Moves: Why Learning Is Not All In Your Head; says that the brain is between 75% and 90% water. Especially in Texas, we need to teach our children the importance of drinking enough water all day long. Like rain, water is best taken in frequent small amounts. Parents and teachers should make sure all children have easy access to water and, if possible, carry their own water bottle throughout the day.
Let's teach our kids the water habit. Parents need to set a good example, and would be wise to carry a water bottle with them to work and in the car. Many of us have a habit of choosing soft drinks, carbonated beverages and juices over water. Try an experiment. For one week, choose water instead of drinks and notice the difference. Children will learn from our example and encouragement. Great job, Mom and Dad!
Susan Lee is an educational consultant for brain development with the Brain Train Center of Austin.
"Why Does Andrew Act So Hyper?"
This is the first generation in which each morning “Andrew” uses shampoo that smells like strawberries and uses soap that smells like a rose garden and is colored blue and green. Then he applies more phenols to his hair with scented hair spray. He applies aluminum-containing and petrochemical dyes. Then he dresses in clothes that smell springtime fresh from scented chemical dryer sheets.
He walks across the carpet and breathes residue of flea killer and shampoo. His parents smoke, so he smells the phenols and various toxins from cigarette secondary air. His parents cover up the cigarette smell with scented room deodorizer, which Andrew also smells as he walks to the kitchen. As he passes through the living room, he smells the phenols from the fireplace.
Once in the kitchen, he pours himself a bowl of Rainbow Colored Krispie Krunchie Yummies, made from rice (instant sugar in his stomach) kept colorfully crunchy by petrochemical dyes and petrochemical preservatives. On the cereal, he puts some neurotoxic aspartame and skim milk that contains BHA as well as herbicide and pesticide residue from the grass eaten by the cow. He also has some white-flour toast (instant sugar) spread with a thick layer of margarine containing artificial flavorings, artificial coloring, and preservatives as well as trans-fats, which further dehydrate him.
Then he has a pancake made from white impoverished flour (instant sugar), fried in margarine, then coated with more margarine. Over all those petrochemical flavorings, colorings, and preservatives, he pours pancake surup containing artificial flavor, artificial coloring, preservatives, and three different forms of sugar.
For his breakfast beverage, he choose a concoction labeled “10 percent real fruit juice” and containing neurotoxic aspartame and assorted petrochemicals in the form of artificial flavorings, colorings and preservatives. For protein, he has some sausage, containing sugar and assorted phenols in the form of erythorbates, nitrites, preservatives, and artificial smoke and maple flavorings.
After breakfast, he walks across that fragrant carpet and through the perfumed and phenol-laden air again, back to the bathroom, where he brushes his teeth with toothpaste that is colored and flavored with more petrochemicals.
Ready at last, he leaves home and walks across the lawn, which has pesticide and herbicide residue on it. As he awaits the school bus, he breathes auto exhaust from passing traffic. When the bus arrives, he enters and sits down. On the way to school, auto exhaust enters every time the doors open and shut.
Once at school, he notices the smell of fresh paint on one of the walls. During first period, he goes to art class, where he uses assorted paints and glues. During second period, he has wood shop class, during which he cuts into particle board (50 percent glue) and coats wood with varnish. After second period, he starts to get thirsty, so he stops at the soda machine and selects artificially flavored, colored, and preserved orange soda pop, which contains the greatest amount of petrochemicals of any flavor of soda pop. For lunch, he has a school lunch replete with artificial flavors, artificial colors, preservatives, starches, and sugars.
Those are some of the reasons Andrew acts so hyper.
Reprinted from: Helping your ADD Child by John F. Taylor Ph D
Are You Adding a Pinch of Plastic to Your Food?
Think twice before you wrap your cheese with plastic wrap. Ditto for defrosting plastic-wrapped chicken in the microwave or for using margarine tubs to heat up leftovers in the microwave. The reason? Researchers are discovering that some plastics contain chemical additives that can pass into food during storage and cooking.
These chemicals can act as “endocrine disruptors” or EDs. EDs can make their way into your food when it comes in contact with certain plastics, plastic wraps, Styrofoam, and polystyrene containers. Because the additives can generally dissolve in fat, they tend to move more freely into high fat foods.
Researchers aren’t yet certain of the effects of EDs in humans, but they suspect they could affect reproductive system development, thyroid functions, immune functions, cognition and the risk of breast and testicular cancer. Scientists also fear that EDs could do the most damage during times of rapid growth: the prenatal period, infancy, early childhood and puberty.
Here are some things you can do to limit your family’s exposure to potential EDs in food: Don’t wrap high fat foods (cheeses, meats, pastries, etc) in plastic wrap. Transfer take-out food in foam cups or plates to different containers upon arriving home. Use wax paper or plastic wrap labeled “polyethylene” to cover food in the microwave and leave and inch between food and the wrap. Avid using wraps labeled “PVC”. Use microwave safe plastic, glass or ceramic to cook or reheat in the microwave. Plastic containers with a “2” or “5” on the bottom of the container are made of polyethylene and polypropylene and are considered to be free of potential EDs.
This Article was taken from: Healthy Food for Healthy Kids" by Bridget Swinney